MyTNLife.blog

Two decades ago, when I started in this industry, the 60+ hour work week was a badge of honor. The longer you stayed, the more respect you earned. We wore exhaustion like it proved something about our commitment. And for a while, maybe it did. But as I grew, I realized the strongest leaders aren’t the ones who burn the brightest. They’re the ones who build something that keeps shining even when they step away.

Hospitality runs 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. That means sooner or later, life will interrupt. You’ll get sick. You’ll lose someone you love. You’ll need time to take care of family or just to breathe again. And that’s when the real test begins.

The best-run properties I’ve ever seen don’t just survive when the leader is gone. They thrive. The checklists hold. The culture holds. The people hold.

I can always tell who the strongest leaders are at brand conferences. They aren’t racing back to their rooms between sessions to update a forecast or handle a guest issue. They’re fully present. Engaged in the material. Laughing with colleagues. Enjoying the rare moment of R&R among people who understand what it takes to keep a hotel alive day and night. They’ve earned the ability to step away because they’ve prepared their teams to step up.

That doesn’t happen by accident. It’s the result of systems, clarity, and trust. It’s a discipline that looks calm on the surface but takes years to develop.

Some general managers try to hold all the cards. They want to control every number, every schedule, every detail. But in my experience, the exact opposite creates real strength. I’ll teach a housekeeper how to read a P&L if that’s what they want to learn. I’ll show a front desk agent how to pull payroll or calculate labor percentages if it helps them grow. That’s just my style.

When I was young in this industry, I remember begging to be taught how to use payroll in our accounting software. My coworkers thought I was crazy. But I wasn’t. I was hungry to understand how this business worked from every angle. That curiosity shaped me more than any seminar or conference ever could.

Modern leadership psychology calls this concept distributed cognition, the idea that the best systems share knowledge and decision-making instead of keeping it at the top. In practice, it means everyone understands the reason behind their work. They’re equipped to act with judgment, not just instruction. It isn’t about control. It’s about shared confidence.

History shows the same pattern. The Roman army built its dominance not on the genius of one general but on the discipline of its legions. Every soldier understood the plan, the standard, and the contingency. The system worked even when the commander fell. In business, it’s the same principle. You aren’t building dependency. You’re building durability.

When life calls you away, your work should not collapse. It should continue, with pride and precision.

Take care of yourself. But more importantly, take care of your team so they can take care of the mission when you can’t be there.

If your property, your office, or your department can run at full strength without you, it isn’t a threat to your importance. It’s proof of it. You’ve built something that endures. That’s the quiet legacy of real leadership.